Today's post is a tough one for me because it's the story a of a very good friend of mine. I'm sharing his story because I believe as he does, that people need to know and hopefully through sharing he can get the help he needs to get the answers he needs and to bring this nightmare to and end so he can move on with his life.
If you believe that you or someone that you know can help in anyway, please contact me directly.
In September, 2014 while on vacation in Hawaii, I was brutally attacked by a man who described himself, his family, his friends and his military buddies as "homophobic". My attacker is a British National and I met him and his wife three days prior to the attack. They were in Hawaii on their honeymoon and during that time he and his wife participated in a number of activities with me and a few of my friends that live there locally.
He explained that he was very curious about someone like me who is attracted to men I was surprised at the increasingly detailed questions that he was asking, but gave the best general answers that I could without being too explicit in my responses. He continued to ask more and more questions delving more and more into my personal life. Despite the questions, we had a pleasant evening and eventually we said good night and went our separate ways.
At approximately 2:30 in the morning I received a text from his wife stating, “Have you fallen asleep? !!” followed by another text at 2:35 stating, “Are you awake?” and finally another text stating, “I need help”. I didn’t notice the texts until she called me. She said her husband had gone crazy, he was yelling and screaming at her and throwing things at her. She said she escaped the room, had gotten outside, but was scared, needed help and asked if she could come to my room. I replied yes.
She said this was the third time she had seen him like this and was terrified. She then asked if I would go talk to him to see if I could calm him down. Based on my experience with them over the past three days, I honestly couldn’t imagine his behavior being as bad as she was describing. They both seemed so genuinely nice, friendly and easy-going. It was their honeymoon and I assumed she was being a little emotional over an argument.
When I arrived at their room he was naked and was screaming at me "Where is my wife?!" I told him that she was ok but that she was scared and had called me and asked that I come talk to him. He continued screaming, “Where’s my wife?, where’s my wife?”. He then picked up the ice bucket and threw it across the room and started choking me and punching me repeatedly. He then demanded that I take my clothes off. I did as he said because I was frightened and wanted him to stop choking and hitting me. I was trying to calm him down and told him everything was ok, his wife was ok and she was coming back. At this point he grabbed me and forcefully pulled me into the bed where he forced me to give him oral sex.
He then began punching me again and strangling me to the point where I couldn’t breathe or talk. I must have lost consciousness at this point because that’s all I remember. I regained consciousness with my knees on the floor and the rest of my body slumped over the side of the bed. I was lying in a pool of blood soaked sheets with the room filled with police officers and paramedics. He had beat me unconscious, raped me with a foreign object and tried to kill me. I was taken to the Queens Medical Center Trauma Unit in Honolulu with head trauma, concussion, fractured nose, fractured eye socket, fractured jaw, fractured throat (hyoid bone), torn rotator cuff, broken ribs, broken teeth and more. My medical records report I was admitted to the E.R. for assault, rape and attempted homicide. Fortunately, I survived but it has been a long road to recovery and I am still trying to get answers and attempting to pursue justice.
It has now been 6 months since I was attacked and despite numerous attempts by myself and others to get status updates on my case, I hit a dead end with every avenue that I try. To this day, I cannot find any information regarding my case. I spoke with a criminal defense attorney, who through a database search, could not find any arrest information, or confirmation that anyone had ever been charged, or even held in custody. The conclusion was that my attacker was likely released and allowed to leave the country.
The police have been very tight lipped and will not provide me any information about the case. Infact, I was told I would never be allowed to get a copy of the police report. They have not reached out to me, requested any information from me, they have not taken my statement or even taken possession of evidence that I have. I am completely amazed at the lack of police attention given to my case in what appears to be a cover up of the crime.
I also reported my attack as a Hate Crime to the FBI and have not gotten any response from them yet either. I have received no victim assistance. I cannot get any information. I am now hiring lawyers & private investigators to assist me in pursuing justice, getting answers and bringing to light what's happened and why my case is being treated as though it never happened.
I have been unemployed for the past 6 months as I have been recovering from my injuries and need even more time to continue my healing. I am using the last of my retirement savings to just get by and survive. As much as I need answers and justice for myself, this case is really about anyone who is the victim of a violent crime, especially a hate crime, and the expectations of our criminal justice system to pursue, charge and convict ofenders. The easiest thing for me to do would be to just walk away, forget about it and move on with life. However, I need justice. I need closure. And I need to take a stand not only for myself but for all other victims - past, present and future.